The Heartbeat

I've got a case of Mommy Brain already. I had an appointment scheduled for the 29th of Decemeber to hear our little friends heartbeat (ok, first I typed that as heartbet, then heartbeast, then heartbest...issues) BUT I thought the 29th was Friday. D'uh. So not Friday. And I only discovered this as I was pulling out Mystic's vet's number to refill her insulin and saw the appt. card with THURSDAY the 29th on it. It was already Friday morning when I discovered this. BAH. I got the appointment rescheduled for Tuesday though so all was "good".

Tuesday brought Matias' first visit to an OB/GYN office!! Quite thrilling for him, no? I had a hard time telling if he was scared, nervous or bored.

I havent gained ANY weight since my last visit - which isnt a bad thing but they just wanted to make sure I hadnt been SO sick that I wasnt eating. That isnt the case but my portions are definitely smaller since I just cannot fit anymore food in during my Meals but I've been snacking (cheese & crackers, veggies, cottage cheese, yogurt...) throughout the day AND I've started eating breakfast (honey nut cherrios, baby) every morning before leaving for work. A big change from Smokes & Coffee, maybe skipping lunch and a late dinner. They are attributing the no weight gain to just eating healthier and keeping an eye on it for my next visit. BUT I DO have a BEBE BELLY!! It's quite noticeable (and thankfully for once it is NOT attributed to weight gain!) and the NP commented on it with praise. So...all good!!

Then the Heartbeat (or Heartbest as I insist on typing it). A few tears ran down my cheeks when I finally shut the hell up and realized what I was hearing and I just turned to Matias and he smiled his lovingest smile at me. It IS a surreal moment & one you can get addicted to and want to hear again and again. That's your bebe in there. And then you hear your slower heartbest on top of it and something just clicks. YOU are a PART OF THIS. I know that sounds abstract or obvious but it's an emotion that simply comes over you. The obvious connection and bond is THERE FOR YOU TO HEAR not just "know". And if you hadnt felt the emotion of "making a baby together" truly come to fruition already than nothing does it more than hearing your baby's heartbest. And to have Matias there with me just brought it altogether and home more to me.

I havent been one to be removed from this experience, I'm fully aware of what's "going on" inside of me but let me be cheesy and cliched for a moment when I say that there is something truly magicial about the first moment you witness this experience. And let me be silly and say "It's ALIVE!!!" :) I can understand why people buy the home doppler kits to hear the heartbest whenever they wish.

The NP commented on what a nice way to start the New Year this has to be & without her knowing that our Anniversary weekend had just passed, it really just made all the more sense that I Mommy Brained on the Thursday appointment and we got this little gift as an Anniversary present.

I'm going back in 5 weeks (now 4 weeks since it's taken me a week to update!), I'll be 16 weeks at that point, to get a test done and another Belly Check. And then at 20 or 22 weeks to get a sonogram - where we will NOT be finding out the sex but will be more than estatic to wave hello to our little friend (as the NP was calling him) at that point!!

Tuesday marks our arrival into our Second Trimester also!! 12 weeks, already? WOW.